The Real Reason You're Always Exhausted (It's Not What You Think)
If You’re Bone-Deep Tired, This Is for You
If you’re a mum or carer who feels bone-deep tired... the kind of exhaustion no amount of sleep can fix then please, take a breath. This is exactly where you belong.
Let’s be real: You’ve tried all the self-care hacks. Gratitude journals, green smoothies, a rushed walk around the block when you can snatch five minutes. You put yourself last, and then beat yourself up for not feeling better. Instead, you’re getting more exhausted, catching every bug, and some of you are dealing with strange symptoms the doctor can’t explain.
I know, because I was there, too... flat out, running on caffeine, wondering if this is just how motherhood is supposed to feel.
And what I discovered? It changed everything for me - and for so many mums I now help.
Why Bubble Baths Aren’t Fixing It
Here’s what no one tells you: Carer burnout isn’t because you just need “more me time.” It runs deeper.
It’s what’s happening inside your body - your nervous system, when you’re under constant, invisible pressure, day in and day out, year after relentless year.
When you parent a child with disabilities, autism, medical needs, or when you’re simply the “one who holds it all together” - your body flicks into survival mode. And then… it gets stuck there.
What Chronic Stress Does to You (Yup, You’re Not Making This Up)
Sure, our bodies can handle a burst of stress - a public meltdown, running late because of bad traffic, the classic call from school. But when every single day is go-go-go with NDIS or IEP plans, appointments, therapies, sleepless nights - your nervous system never gets a rest. Ever.
Here’s what that looks like on the inside:
- Permanent "fight or flight" mode. Constant adrenaline and cortisol flood your body, like your foot’s stuck on the accelerator.
- Immune system burnout. You catch every cold. Heal slow. Always feel run down.
- Stomach chaos. Suddenly you’ve got reflux, IBS, random nausea, weird food sensitivities (that weren’t there before).
- Chronic pain and inflammation. Headaches, aches, joints that hurt, even weird rashes.
- Your body forgets how to sleep. Either you can’t fall asleep, can’t stay asleep, or you wake up more tired than before.
- It all just feels… heavier. Brain fog, unexplained pain, snapping at the smallest thing, patience worn razor-thin.
And here’s the scary part: A whole bunch of these symptoms get called everything but “burnout.” Doctors tell you it’s:
- Fibromyalgia
- Chronic fatigue
- Migraines
- Thyroid or autoimmune issues
- IBS
- Unexplained allergies
- Tension headaches
Or, you get told, “All your tests are normal!” Like, thanks so much for that. (Insert eye roll. At least the script matches the mystery pain.)
But it’s not just in your head. These are your body’s flashing red lights: “I can’t keep going like this.”
You’re Not Broken - You’re Stuck
If you’re dragging through your days feeling half-alive, joints aching, mind in a fog, stomach a mess and no one gets it... please, hear me:
You are NOT lazy. You are NOT broken. You’re not doing motherhood “wrong.”
You’re just living in a body stuck on high alert, waiting for a break that never comes. That’s not failure. That’s a survival response. It means your body works - it’s just stuck in “save everyone else” mode.
And if you’re wondering if this constant struggle is just what motherhood has to be? Hear this: It doesn’t have to be this way. You can actually feel presence, clarity, even joy again.
Why You Have to Come First (Yes, YOU)
I wish someone had whispered this in my ear years ago: If you want to give your child the best version of you, healing yourself has to come first.
It’s not selfish. It’s not indulgent. It’s basic, necessary foundation-building - like putting your oxygen mask on first so you can help your child put on theirs.
When you feel whole, rested, and safe in your body, your child feels it too. Their nervous system takes cues from yours (it’s called co-regulation), and it’s the real magic behind any parenting strategy.
You can’t pour from empty, love. You can’t model calm when you’re running on fumes. And you don’t have to.
👉 Want to hear exactly how I broke the burnout loop (and what ACTUALLY works)? Watch my quick video below for the real story.
Need the actual strategies? My free Calm Mum Toolkit has some practical tools I wish I’d had years ago - grab it now, and let’s start feeling better together.
You’re not too far gone. Not by a long shot.
[Watch Video] [Grab Calm Mum Toolkit]
You Heal, Your Child Heals
Here’s what I want you to remember: When you take steps to regulate your nervous system, your child’s world shifts too.
Your grounded presence is what truly helps them feel safe and calm (even more than any therapy worksheet or sticker chart). This is co-regulation. This is the gold.
Stay tuned (subscribe to my YouTube channel so you don't miss it) - I’ll show you real-life co-regulation in action in my next video. Meltdowns get shorter, connection goes deeper, and both of you start to feel safe again.
You’re Not Too Far Gone. You’re Never Alone.
If any of this hit home, I’d love to help you more:
- Grab my free Calm Mum Toolkit: Gentle, science-backed tools for carers who are flat-out exhausted. No fluff—just real relief.
- Join the Anchored Mum Project: The world’s first nervous system healing course just for carers, by a fellow carer. Six gentle weeks to start your nervous system repair
- Subscribe on YouTube: Weekly videos on burnout recovery, nervous system resets, and peaceful parenting—short, simple, practical.
- **Share this with another mum or carer who needs to hear “you are not alone.” Let’s make soothing and healing contagious, for carers and kids.
Your health, your peace, your spark - they aren’t luxuries. They’re the roots of joyful family life.
You can heal. And I’ll walk alongside you every step.
Take a breath. Let your shoulders drop. You’re here, you’re enough, and you’ve SO got this.
What surprised you most reading this? What’s hitting home? Pop a comment below and let’s start the real conversation.
Sending big love and actual, practical hope your way. Jade x
